Religious Narcia

Christmas and the Religious Narcissist

Religious Narcia rears its ugly sweater at Christmas because nothing excites a narcissist more than telling strangers how to live their lives. It's the time of year when religious abuse runs on a high. There are all brands of crazy that go on when the days are darker and people are desperate to make it to the end of… Continue reading Christmas and the Religious Narcissist

Narcissism, Relationship

What Narcissism Can Do

When Marla went No Contact from her abuser, her flying monkey sister kept saying, “But you never know how long Grandmother is going to live.” It’s true, when someone dies, we mourn them, but what most flying monkeys don’t realize is many survivors of narcissism mourn the loss of relationships every day. Which is worse,… Continue reading What Narcissism Can Do

Narcissism

Why Narcissistic Hoovering Sucks

Hayley left Joe six months ago. For the first time since she met him, she was finally free. Free of his criticism, free of his control, free of his cheating and free of his lies. She hadn’t met anyone new, but she was loving her freedom. She rarely thought of Joe and had zero interest… Continue reading Why Narcissistic Hoovering Sucks

Narcissism

You Might Have Been Raised by a Narcissist

If you grew up with a parent who put their needs above yours, you might have been raised by a narcissist. If you were in charge of cleaning house for your parents, you might have been raised by a narcissist. If you've been lying to bill collectors since you were five, you might have been raised… Continue reading You Might Have Been Raised by a Narcissist

Resilience, Restoration

More Than a Cup of Kindness

All I know is that the rocking started before I even had a self and I lived through the feeling of it. I rocked until I left home. And I’m not talking about being a cool eighties, punk rocker, but more like an autistic child who rocks back and forth to shut the world out.… Continue reading More Than a Cup of Kindness

Resilience

A Flying Monkey by Any Other Name

When one of my sisters informed me she’s not a “winged monkey,” I laughed and told her I could tell she was talking about me because the only other person who’s ever used that term is my other sister.  The term flying monkey comes from the movie The Wizard of Oz. The reason my sisters… Continue reading A Flying Monkey by Any Other Name

Hope, Resilience

Hope for the Holidays

If only we could live in a Hallmark Movie, maybe we’d find going home something to look forward to, but my experience in planning hallmark moments is it always turns out more like the “Home for the Holidays" movie. With some families all you can do is hunker down for a long winter’s nap and… Continue reading Hope for the Holidays

Community

How to Plan a Narcissist Free Holiday

Beth wants the impossible. She wants a nice family dinner with sharks. No, I’m not talking about a shark diving expedition, I'm referring to the feeding frenzy of triangulation and gossip that surrounds every family gathering in her family of origin. Last year's dinner was ruined by the narcissist grilling her about her engagement to… Continue reading How to Plan a Narcissist Free Holiday

Resilience

Walking Away from Narcissism

May those that love us, love us. And those that don't love us, May God turn their hearts, If He can't turn their hearts, May he turn their ankles So we'll know them by their limping. -An Old Irish Curse Many of us started on this journey of understanding narcissism when we noticed something wrong… Continue reading Walking Away from Narcissism

Uncategorized

How to Avoid the Narcissist’s Triangulation Game

Lindsey was tired of her three sisters knocking on her door to tell her what her mother was saying about her new husband. She knew her narc mom didn’t like him because he strengthened her own boundaries, but she was unprepared for how it affected her relationships with her sisters. One day she woke up… Continue reading How to Avoid the Narcissist’s Triangulation Game